What is Addiction to you?
Written by Shomblue on . Posted in
March 17, 2017 at 8:08 am #381842
Hello everyone! as you can see, I’m interested in finding out what does addiction means to you. I do know that on a general basis, it means just one thing, however I am still interested in finding out what do you people think about it. I have to say that I did have searched information about this but pretty much everything that I have got has been some threads that were only fact based and articles with studies etc. etc. however I am searching for opinions and that’s why I’m here asking you this question.
also, I need to say that I am going to keep my opinion to myself for now, later I would share it, maybe (I do it so if someone feels differently than I do still can post because I don’t want to kind of imply my opinion here to anybody). also, I do know that almost everybody of those people who ‘experiment’ with or even regularly are taking different and various drugs are going to say that it is all fine and that all you have to do is not to let your usage to get out of the control but that’s why I am here. I want to know what do you consider to be out of control? that’s my question here… is it an event to you? or maybe a feeling? how do you feel about this?
March 17, 2017 at 8:34 am #381845
now, look. we all know that whenever a person is taking a drug – it can either be harmful (detrimental) or helpful for that person who uses it. now I consider that for as long as the person who uses that certain drug and it is still helpful then that isn’t considered to be addiction. although I can’t surely say what addiction is, I have once heard that drug addiction it is defined as when a person is still continuing to use a substance when they do know that it is already more harmful (detrimental) to them than helpful. There are a lot of drugs users (most of them) who will tell you that it is all fine, that they are fine. they would most likely tell you: I’m perfectly happy with my level of drug consumption but most of them would want to stop taking them but they can’t, I consider that to be drug addiction.
well, in my own humble opinion, I am thinking that addiction it is becoming a real problem when feeding the addiction starts to become your priority. I mean, any kind of addiction is bad, but as long as it interferes little to nothing at all with your every day life then that’s ‘acceptable’ but it still should be stopped because it can ‘evolve’ in the ‘next level’ which is as I said earlier – when it becomes your priority and by saying this I try to say that, for example, if you are not able to hold a job due to the fact that you NEED to be drunk. I have to admit that I am in absolutely no way a stand up citizen, however I am myself a high functioning drug user. that’s what I was talking about – I am owning a business, I am able to do my job properly, I am able to hold a relationship… hell, in fact I can tell you that I try to keep it all so invisible and incognito that I have quite a few friends that don’t even know that I use. and it is not the thing that like I lie to them – they simply don’t know about it and they haven’t asked, and so I won’t be running to anyone telling about this.
but generally I think that as soon as the drug (or any other kind of) addiction starts to interfere with your daily life and to complicate your functions as a member of society or anywhere else, I do believe that this is when it is a real problem. like for example, I do know that there are people doing illegal stuff to get their drugs – robbing somebody or someplace in order to fund drugs or blowing mortgage money on their drugs (or whichever else they need). if somebody else thinks differently I am always open for opinions!
March 17, 2017 at 9:31 am #381846
so… to answer your main question… ‘out of control’ personally for me means when my usage of any substance (or anything else out there) already becomes more important than anything else in life, or also when I find myself using that something or that substance when I don’t really want to be using it… that’s pretty much the same sometimes, but not always, that’s why I thought about posting both cases when I consider them to be ‘out of control’. personally for me, there is absolutely nothing very subtle about it. if *I gotta’ have it* then I do know that I am addicted. exactly as it has been said by the previous poster here, out of control is when taking down that certain substance that you want is becoming more important to you than your job, either your relationships, to get the bills paid and things like this. if my quality of life is starting to slip even a little bit because of my usage, then I do know that I am getting addicted (or I am already addicted). if a substance touches you anyhow else than just *I take it because I need it to function normally* the that’s kind of addiction. however if I can either take or leave a particular substance and I don’t really care whether I am having it or I am not, then I do know that I am not addicted to it.
anyway, if talking about myself and my experience I can tell you that I have found that my addictive energy has just moved around from substance to substance changing it around and activity to activity. I am trying to say that I have been just as addicted to running and compulsive shopping as I have been to both alcohol as well as opioids too. however I should say that a lot of it has to do with how much time, with how much money and my energy I find myself to be investing from day to day in that particular action I do or substance I take. Addiction is vast and it is indeed, barely known. it can be very strange. like for example, I personally have been addicted to NOT eating as well as I have also been addicted to overeating – I’ve been addicted to both ends of eating disorders spectrum! Generally, for me food has become a total compulsion because every time I have been in need of either pigging out on it until I couldn’t even stand up or other times I have been trying to avoid it completely and I could go without eating a lot of time, and so it has consumed a lot of my waking energy and so, after that, there wasn’t a lot of energy left for me over for some other activities that I should do.
what I can tell you for sure is that addiction has never been any kind of ‘event’ for me or something like this and that’s because it has been happening gradually, over a period of time, there wasn’t such a thing as when I woke up and I realized that I am addicted or something like that. for me it was slowly and gradully, like for example, I have been introduced to oxycodone kind of late in my life, when I have been around 38 years old or such, when I have ruptured a disk in my back. I’ve gotta tell you that I really loved the way that the drug was making me feel, I was feeling very good on it, however, even so, when my prescriptions were empty, I was not trying or even thinking to find any more. I was fine without it too. then later, with my next injury, I have found myself consuming the pain pills at double the prescribed pace, however I still did not seek out any more of them each time when I was running out of those pills. some years have passed like this and I have been find but that’s until I have started to find myself getting caught up in chasing those pills down and needing more and more of it. I mean, even during that time I was still trying to keep my dosages pretty low, and I did kept them, however as I said, I started to find myself taking more and more if it, I gradually started to see that my consumption of this drug is increased and that continued like that until I have crossed the line into the serious pill popping. this process has taken me some years because it all started slowly and gradually and I guess this is one of the reasons why I didn’t even realized where it is all going to… anyway, after some years I have got hooked and when did got hooked on them then I was really hooked and therefore, some devastating events has started to occur in my life because of this. as you all know… such kind of devastating things must occur so people could understand. that’s was the case for me too… unfortunately.
to stop this opioids addiction that I have been into has been hard and unpleasant and it has also taken me some years. in all these years I have went through many starts and relapses and that’s all until I have finally started one of my stopping efforts and it finally has worked out. everything seemed fine and everything indeed was fine as I have stayed clean for a number of some years, but then later, instead of popping opioids I have started to drink until I was drinking every day! I have HAD to have my evening wine, I couldn’t go without it! I HAD to drink it and it doesn’t matter of everything else, that’s even if it meant spending more on the wine than I spent on the food that I ate. I mean – really, I could spend my last money on wine and had nothing left to buy from food than just a bread or something and I was still purchasing that wine. I was always saving money on food to spend on money then. after that, I have gradually and slowly introduced (re introduced) opioids back into my life, but I’ve been doing it in a highly controlled fashion and now I am taking them on an average one time per month and that’s only if I am still able to get some but if I can’t then simply don’t take it and to be honest, I don’t really care. this is how I realize that I am not any longer addicted to the opiates now, however I have started to notice that I am smoking more and more cigarettes instead. I mean, as you can see, it is always changing, it is transforming in something else, or this addiction goes somewhere else – in whatever the case I can tell you that this is a really tiresome cycle that I’ve been going through my entire life, it has been lifelong for me! however, what I want to say is that there is a thing that I am really proud of and it is that I have been successful so far to stay away from the extremely terrible three things out there: heroin, crack cocaine and methamphetamine. the reason why I said that I am proud with myself about not trying any of them is that from as much I have seen – lots of people who get addicted to opioids, alcohol or some other stuff end up being addicted to one of those terrific 3 substances. and trust me I have been staying away from them not because I would not want to use them ( as I said, I guess everybody who is addicted to opioids/ alcohol start to think about it), but it is mostly because I do know myself very well and knowing myself so well means that I do know that I am going to get hooked up on either one of them nearly immediately. I do know that they are so addictive and I do know myself that just a few uses would make me addicted… so I did have drawn the line at letting myself go that far down the tubes which I really hope that I am never going to pass over it.
I should say that I one really believe that the addictive tendencies are being inherited to a very great degree! in my personal case, I have gotten it as a *gift* because I have descended it from our 4 grandparents all of which were alcoholics so if I wouldn’t ever have been alcoholic that would be a big surprise for me… this is why I am feeling that the die was cast for me even before I have been born so… not trying to make an excuse here but that’s what I am feeling about it. I have also learned from my environment too because I have had a mother who drank wine and has been popping pills whenever the very little amount of stress has entered her life, but stress is always there so, guess what happened next. I’ve had it all written in my genetics and that’s what I have seen during my entire childhood and teen ages as well as first part of my adult life. so well.. she has then killed herself in the end… and despite my best intentions, I did have tried for serious 4 times before I gave it up due to the fact that I couldn’t quite seem to have success on this. plus to that I’ve got to say that I personally am considering the suicidal tendencies also to be addictive too. so later in time… I have given up mine and now I’ve given up on it completely so I have decided to commit the rest of my life to helping other people to stick around on the planet instead of doing that so that I am going to have some good pals to play with here. either way, one thing is that should I ever receive a terminal diagnosis and I reserve the right to change my mind about all of this.
anyway, it seems that I start to go off topic so I am just going to try to return on our thread here and I am also going to try to put it succinctly as it seems that it becomes a too big post now so I say: I one believe that addiction is: the investment of that person’s energy, time, money and even soul into that something that it is harming that person and also thing that the person is not able to stop on using that something without a lot of agony of withdrawal in all emotional, mental as well as physical. in case I am able to quit that stuff easily and without much of an effort then I am not really addicted to that stuff, and if I don’t really care if I would stop taking it or not. however if I do care so I can take it and if it woos me continually and I am feeling agony, frustration, bad feeling and so on and so forth every single time when I am not able to have it then yeah – then I am addicted for sure. like for example, I am addicted to cigarettes and that’s for sure. it fits it all to ‘out of control’ just except for the fact that it doesn’t interfere with my job, relationships etc. I mean – I do know it is harmful and I still do it and I am in full agony if there aren’t any cigarettes around me for few hours and I can’t smoke. I’ve got to say that I used to think that I am addicted to coffee too, but not so long ago I have quit it with very little disturbance so I realized that I am not… however I am still smoking a pack a day of cigarettes (at least a pack a day) and there is hell to pay for if I am running out of them!
and one final thing here… I can tell you people how, in fact, charged this subject is for me, due to the fact that I am feeling really agitated as I am writing out my answer to this question due to the fact that it really touches me (of course… with all my story). whichever the case I can tell you that I am feeling a very big pressure of anxiety and so I am reaching for another sip of wine and yet one more cigarette as I am watching the clock creeping towards the midnight and plus to that I do know very well that I am not going to be in bed sleeping any time soon due to the fact that I am also being addicted to stay up more than half of the night nearly every single night. in fact, I forgot the last time when I went to bed like a normal human being…
March 20, 2017 at 11:19 am #381851
to me there are 2 types of addictions and there’s a big difference between the 2 although both are addictions. the first one is physical dependence to that substance – if the use of that particular substance is getting great enough then without that particular substance you are in for some fun (such stuff as booze, benzos, opiates etc.). the second one (second type of addiction) it is the mental dependence, the mind altering state and the escape is what nabs you (weed or some other stuff, I’m not very sure). if you think about this for a minute you could realize that the first kind of addiction can also be the second one, however the second one cannot ever be the first one. I mean, there are stuff that you don’t know how it works – it just does and that’s it. this is like what’s the meaning of life question. there’s nothing what you can do about and there is no right or there is no wrong answer either.
March 20, 2017 at 11:40 am #381852
I just feel that whoever is addicted wants to control this drug addiction…. that’s because they all know that it is really harmful for their body and for their relations etc. etc. we all know that when addiction is out of control then you are feeling that the problem level is so high that you don’t know what to do next.
March 20, 2017 at 11:53 am #381853
well, I am not an expert but I am just going to try to tell what I am thinking about it… about addiction… each time thinking about it, I am actually thinking about: interpersonal alienation, trauma, emotional deregulation as well as obsession and compulsion.
March 20, 2017 at 12:18 pm #381854
hey people. I’ve seen your post and I really liked this thread, just not so long ago I have read an article about this which I really like, if you are interested then you could read it yourself. go on substance information network org site and once there search for the following article title: ‘Understanding the concepts of dependence, addiction, and substance use disorders.’
I’ve always been interested in learning more about this and I do think that you people would like that given article as well. as far as when it constitutes addiction, my own definition it is something like the following: that’s a psychological reliance upon a substance or an activity that it is producing the feeling of euphoria which is manifesting in an overwhelming compulsion to search it out, to such a big extent that cognitively, emotionally as well as behaviorally it is constituting a very big level of impairment and distress.
now, as far as the events go, I really do not believe that it is being accurate for the most people, if not all people to attribute the addiction to just one single event which I really doubt. even if there is such a person who can surely identify that point where that person have went from not being an addict to being addict (which I really doubt about this but anyway), that even is still simply the last event in a long chain so still – that’s not an event and it doesn’t really matter.
and lastly, the out of control is being subjective assessment and therefore, the very and very big distress or/ and impairment that I have given in my definition above. however, we shouldn’t forget the fact that what means this very big or extreme distress or impairment for one person then it may not be the same for another person and that’s why we should think about this as of individual – exactly as we should think about people as being individuals (and although this does sound simple, I do know people don’t often think like this). hope this is going to give an answer to your questions.
March 20, 2017 at 1:04 pm #381855
hi all again. what I can say about this is… smoking cigarettes last night in the time that I have been coughing, wheezing as well as feeling very short of breath it does occurs to me to add to this thread that addiction is very often (if not always) involving causing harm to our bodies but even so, continuing to use that substance anyway. those people who are addicted to alcohol are blowing out their livers, those people addicted to heroin are getting terrible abscesses, people addicted to methamphetamine tend to lose their teeth and so on and so forth and we all know that the beat goes on and on and unfortunately, we are still going on using that… we do know very well that we are hurting ourselves continously and that there’s nothing good by doing what we doin’, however the craving it is just so so strong that the addiction just continues further like that and that’s even though we know that people have visits to the emergency room, they have all sorts of medical procedures, sometimes even surgeries and lastly – even death. we know that people die from that certain addictive substance, we know and we can feel it hurts ourselves, we even went to ER because of it – we still use it!
but of course, I am now talking about the ultimate and strongest addiction, I think that it is at the extreme. doubtless there are kind of ‘levels’ of addiction – one being worse than another. and yeah, by the way, I did have slapped on a patch this morning and I have not smoked today so far… however I still don’t feel like I should be praised for now and that’s due to the fact that it seems that I am quitting all of the time continuously, but never until the end… I mean, I guess it is obvious that I can’t just stay quit. I am really hoping and thinking that maybe this time it is going to take.. but I also do realize that maybe it won’t…. whichever the case, I do know that I am already getting too old now to just keep on messing around with this type of bull sh*t anymore so I’ve gotta do something about it as I really do care about my health (and I say this because I do know that there are people who don’t). however, even so, I do know that when in the heart of our addictions, many of us simply overlook permanent damage to our health and well being in favor of the temporary high feeling… we all know it. at least those who posted here. I personally know it very well myself and that’s very sad I think.. but that’s true, that’s the reality!
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